Today I was listening to some Hootie & the Brofish while sipping a natty when I realized, the early 90’s were chill as fuck. I mean, back then, I was suckin’ on titties… I’m 36.
today i woke up in my girlfriends bed. there were four people there, me, my girlfriend, my gfs mom and my gf’s sister. they had my bro sauce on their faces and they are all fuckin bangin. i mustve had a good night. MLIB
today in math class my teacher asked me for the answer. I had no clue, so i said sandwich. She told me to go out to the hall. she domed me and gave me her lunch (a sandwich). im in 9th grade. MLIB.
today i was driving and pulled up to a cross walk where people were waiting. it was a green light but i noticed the guy at the front of the line was a 40 yearold or so, carrying a case of natty and wearing a snapback, clearly a bro. i let him pass, and on the way over, we fist bumped.
Today my bitch gave me some dome in my ice cream truck, then she made me an ice cream sandwich. It doesn’t get any chiller then that.
today i gave my bro permission when i die to change my facebook status to “chillin with jesus in heaven like a bro”
For every word I say to my boyfriend, I have to make him 3 sandwiches and 2 bjs. His life is bro.
Today my teacher told me i couldnt survive a day without water. i told her shes wrong, i cant survive a day without a natty. MLIB
Today I got dome on a ski lift.. it was chill
My Brofessor asked us to make a list of Goals we have in life, So I wrote mine.
1) get a case of natty.
2) pump some dave
3) make some bitches fix us some six foot sandwiches
4) fist bump
5) play some lax
I achieved all of this before 3pm. MLIB.